Love is in the air... weddings 1, 2, ... and 3?

A few weeks ago, my colleague got married... twice... and the third is still to come. First, there was the “Traditional” Wedding, then the Court Wedding... and one day... there will also be a Church Wedding. Getting married in Cameroon is quite the affair!!!

On the day of the Traditional Wedding, I was told to meet my colleagues at 3:30PM, so... I decided to show up at 4:15PM... and I was the first to arrive! I waited until 5:00PM when a few people started showing up and we made our way to the bride’s family home. There, I must say... it was a strange and unique experience. We sat in rows... inside and outside... really not saying much... while the groom and his various representatives met with the bride’s family in closed quarters. I really wish I could have seen what was going on in there. Basically, they were negotiating the bride’s price. Poor him, he was rather stressed, as it appeared as though they were not agreeable for quite some time... he even had to ask to borrow some cash as he felt he was running low! He would come in and out, a bit stressed... and I never really knew exactly what was going on. Top Secret. This went on for hours. Until finally at 9:00PM, we were actually offered drinks. I found the whole ceremony strange because, unlike most African celebrations, there was no music, dancing, drumming, or even speeches... and they really like speeches... no talking... we just waited. At one point, they came out and the groom gave a chicken to the bride’s family. And the bride was poored some palm wine and she had to drink from it and search the room for her groom and offer him a drink... then, he drank from the glass (well, it was actually a cow’s horn) and then I think they were married! The food came at 9:30PM... and after a long day, I scooted out early... at 10:00PM, while others were still arriving (for the food!)... just sitting and looking at the happy, yet rather tired couple, who had been busily preparing for the day.

Onto the Court Wedding... that day... I was more prepared... I even came with reading material. I was told it would begin at 9:00AM... and although my father would say “better to be early than late”... in the Cameroonian context perhaps we can make an exception? I decided to arrive at 10:30AM instead. I got through half my magazine, by the time the ceremonies began at 11:30AM! And, just when you think, they’ll be married... again... they had to wait for fifteen other couples to say their vows before them... after the Mayor gave a good, long speech about the meaning of marriage... in pidgin, of course. They were the last couple to wedd, but the best! Interesting... before saying their vows... they were asked questions like: “will you have separate or joint property?”, “will this marriage be monogamous or polygamous?”, the women were encouraged to bear many children... and then they would repeat their vows, raise their hands, and put on their rings. Afterwards... we went back to their house for food and speeches and celebrations... again. Can’t wait for the church wedding!

Congrats Eric and Gwen!